Memorial Red Rose

Dead Man Walking

I’m a bored individual with nothing to do.

I’m a bored individual that does drugs in the loo.

I’m a bored individual that sleeps around and screws,

I’m a bored individual that’s so fucking bored I’ll even screw you too.

 

I’m sitting on a wall watching the world go by,

I’m sitting on a wall and so fucking angry I could cry.

I’m sitting on a wall in this city all alone feeling lost and confused,

I’m sitting on a wall contemplating killing myself because I’ve nothing else to lose.

 

I’m looking through park railings with my two wino friends,

I’m looking through park railings as a means to an end.

I’m looking through park railings thinking I might get a job,

I’m looking through park railings thinking I might sell my arse for a couple of bob.

 

I’m standing in a subway holding out my hand,

I’m standing in a subway in the hope of doing a deal so that I can score a gram.

I’m standing in a subway because I want to be away from the fucking daylight,

I’m standing in a subway going out of my mind and to claim a bed for the night.

 

I’m asleep in the doorway of a shop entrance in Tottenham Court Road,

I’m asleep in the doorway wrapped up in my sleeping bag away from the fucking cold.

I’m asleep in the doorway talking to my dead mother and friends,

I’m asleep in the doorway safe from reality and feeling the warm glow that heroin brings.

 

I’m lying down in a coffin watching the lid being screwed down,

I’m lying down in a coffin aware that my journey is over as I’m lowered into the ground.

I’m lying down in a coffin remembering the happiness I felt as a child living near the sea,

I’m lying down in a coffin wandering how it came to me being dead at only twenty three.

 

The resentment I feel is too much to bear,

The resentment I feel towards others that no one really cared.

The resentment I feel at not being able to integrate with society,

The resentment I feel that I was let down and abandoned by the bastard authorities.